the time has come.

Let me preface all of this by saying that I am not a crier. As I sit here to write this, I can feel the welling feeling that happens in your eyes before you cant hold the salty tears any longer.

I am writing now to say that the time has come. That time being the week I leave my new and free dorm room to the old and familiar home.

The other day, I thought I was ready to leave. To take a break so I will be all set to come back at the end of the summer. Today, as I packed and watched my roommate/really good friend clean her stuff and prepare to jet on home, I couldnt help but feel upset.

That was the first time today that I had the feeling in my eyes.

The realization wasnt so prominent until now that home is going to be so much different than it is here.

My best friends wont be there talking to me at 12:00 am about random things and there wont be someone to go eat breakfast, lunch and dinner with everyday. TV shows will feel lonely and only the memories will sustain the view from my loft.

Next year, I wont be coming to the same room either. When I walk out the door it will be my last time in this room as a resident--my last time being in a quad, climbing down from my ladder and looking out over the caf and people walking by.

Surprisingly to myself, I am actually a bit anxious to get home. Its not that I want to be there so badly per se, its more that im ready to get this goodbye over with.

Im ready for a break from the things that have been going on in my room, ready to move on to my next year and summer and ready to have said my farewell, bring my things home and not be sad about whats going on.

So, the next time I write here, I may be writing from home. My home home, not the home I have established here with the people I love dearly and have become family.